The Lovers Day Playbook
SEX
1o MIN READ
Okay babes, and gays, gather around because I’ve got two very different guides for you. One is all sugar, spice, and everything nice— PG-13, family friendly, heart flutter, peck on the cheek, rom-com vibe.
And the other? Well... you know.
So, for the lovebirds and lust-driven romantics, let’s talk about The Day. The holiday of pink-hued, chocolate-dipped, heart-shaped everything. The one that’s either wildly overhyped or deeply underrated, depending on how much serotonin you’ve got to spare.
Valentine’s Day.
But here’s the thing—we’re not doing the basic, pre-fixed menu, drugstore teddy bear, obligatory lingerie set kinda V-Day. No, no. We’re curating an experience. A night that feels like chocolate covered everything and whispered secrets. A night so good it lingers on your skin the next morning.
This is the ultimate guide to making February 14th actually worth remembering. Whether you’re in a relationship, a situationship, a no-labels-just-vibes kinda deal, or simply romancing yourself (as you absolutely should be), this is your blueprint to the perfect Love Day.
I have nothing but love for my PG sweethearts — this one is for you:
Image by @nicoleolachi on Pinterest
Here is everything that you need to do, taste, and feel on this Love Day: Young Adult/teen rating-ish?
Setting the Scene is Crucial
Forget the glaring lights of a restaurant where you can hear someone else’s awkward first-date banter. You need a mood, an ambiance, a setting that says something romantic could potentially go down.
Candles? A Given. Fairy lights could be cute. But candles, definitely.
A classic film playing in the background (Before Sunrise, In the Mood for Love—anything that oozes sexy yearning).
The Art of the Slow Burn
Listen, physical contact is an art form. And no, we’re not talking about the kind of public displays of affection that make people gag at brunch. We’re talking about delicious, subtle, slow-burn touches that keep the night buzzing.
Whisper instead of speak. Make them lean in.
Hold hands under the table and trace patterns on their palm like it’s a secret language.
Handwritten notes over a mass-produced card—but make it spicy. A love letter? A confession? Maybe a proposition?
Flirting isn’t just about words—it’s about micro-movements. It’s the way you tilt your head when you listen, the way you graze their thigh under the dinner table, the way you say their name like it’s a secret.
Master this, and you own the night, I promise.
The Ritual of Indulgence
Valentine’s Day isn’t about eating just to eat—it’s about Indulging. Savoring. Tasting.
Turn dinner into foreplay.
Skip the overpriced dinner and cook together. Pasta-making? Chocolate-tasting? An intimate, baking-covered mess?
Feed each other—grapes, dark chocolate, a stolen sip of wine.
Lick the chocolate off your fingers (slowly, obviously.) They do it in movies and surprisingly it’s sexy in real life too.
And if you must order takeout, at least make it decadent. Champagne and sushi in bed? French pastries and espresso at midnight? A five-star meal enjoyed in nothing but silk robes? Now we’re talking.
Soundtrack to a Love Story
Music is a love language and Sound is a time machine. Your playlist sets the tone, and if you’re still playing ‘Bedroom Playlists’ on Youtube at this point, I need you to re-evaluate your life choices.
Your playlist should feel like a love letter— songs can bring you back to a first touch, a last goodbye, a promise made in whispers. Think sultry jazz, slow R&B, classic soul. Something that makes your chest ache in the best way.
Make a playlist together—songs that make you feel like a 90s movie couple on the verge of making out.
Whisper instead of talk—just to see what happens.
And if you really want to turn up the heat? Read poetry out loud.
And no, not some cringey Hallmark-card nonsense—real poetry. Pablo Neruda’s I crave your mouth, your voice, your hair. Warsan Shire’s Make love like you have no secrets. Or maybe, something you wrote at 3 AM when the world was asleep and it was just you and your thoughts.
Valentine’s Day isn’t about checking a box. It’s about a feeling a moment. A night you’ll want to relive again and again. So make it memorable.
Now this is where things stop being sugar and spice, so if thats NOT your jam, I’d stop scrolling now.
Image by @CottonBroStudios
How to Make Love Last All Night (Literally and Metaphorically): Bedroom Edition.
Alright, let’s talk about the real reason you’re here. Because if we’re being honest, Valentine’s Day isn’t just about dinner reservations and rose petals. It’s about what happens after.
Sex is not a race. There’s no gold medal for finishing first (and if there was, we’d all be judging hard). The best kind of intimacy? The kind that lingers. The kind that makes your skin hum and your breath hitch.
Your Bedroom is Foreplay
Listen, if your bedroom is lit up like a hospital waiting room, we’ve got bigger problems. Sexy spaces make sexy moments, and lighting is everything. Ambiance is foreplay. It’s the difference between an okay night and the kind you still feel the next morning.
Candles. Everywhere. Fire hazard? Maybe. Sexy? Absolutely.
Sheets that feel luxurious against bare skin. We’re talking silk, Egyptian cotton—something worth ruining (and if you can’t afford that, it’s okay… really. I still get the MainStays microfiber sheets from Walmart. I never cared, nor have I reached that level of adulthood yet. But to each their own.)
A playlist with zero skips. Sexy jazz, slow R&B, something with a bassline that feels like foreplay.
And while we’re at it, let’s rethink color palettes. Valentine’s Day is more than red, white, and pink.
Go for deep navy, burnt amber, moody greens—colors that make you feel wrapped up in luxury.
The Buildup: Make Them Wait
Sex isn’t about getting from point A to point B. It’s about the in-between moments. The slow, teasing unraveling of it all.
And you know what’s sexy? Anticipation. The moment before the kiss, the millisecond before lips touch.
Draw. It. Out.
I’ve got some other ideas for you too:
Blindfold them and play “guess the object.” Soft fabric? Ice cube? Your body?
Use fingertips instead of hands—barely touch, just enough to tease.
Undress painfully slow. One item of clothing at a time. Something about this will drive them insane.
And ladies, let’s talk shop for a second—self-pleasure is a love language. Knowing your own body? Sexy. Feeling comfortable enough to show your partner exactly what you want? Even sexier. If you haven’t already, get intimately acquainted with yourself. Experiment. Play. Turn yourself on before expecting anyone else to.
this leads me to my next point…
The Art of Solo Pleasure
Before you please anyone else, you better know how to please yourself.
Self-pleasure isn’t just a thing you do—it’s a ritual. Set the scene, light the candles, make yourself your own best lover.
Self-touch isn’t just for when you’re alone—it can be part of shared intimacy. Let them watch. Let them learn.
Explore something new— your body changes, and so do your desires. Take the time to rediscover yourself.
and saving the best for last—
The Aftercare is Just as Important
This Valentine’s Day, forget the rush. Forget the performance. Make it about feeling every second. Make it sexy, slow, and hard to breathe. And for the love of everything holy—don’t just roll over and scroll on your phone after.
Stay in bed longer. Trace their skin, play with their hair, memorize the moment.
Tell them what you loved—words matter.
Sleep in, wake up slow, and do it all over again. Many, many times.
Okay.
That was a lot but it felt good to get that out there. Sometimes I rethink my career of being a High School History teacher for being a Sex therapist… I feel like it’s interesting and also who doesn’t love to talk about sex?
Anyways, that’s a wrap besties. Whether you’re playing it sweet and flirty or getting lost in each other until the sun comes up, just remember that Valentine’s Day is about more than just the flowers and chocolates.
XOXO,
Lyna
